It all started so wonderfully...
I married the most amazing man, picked up my life and moved halfway around the world from Boston, USA, to Sydney, Australia. Back then I was carefree with only a couple of boxes of possessions. I had myself to look after and only me to think about. When I arrived in Australia it was a challenge, but a fun challenge, to understand the culture and country I was going to call home. For four years my husband and I travelled, learned and soaked in new experiences, building our lives as a couple.
And then one day it happened. My husband called it the frying pan moment. It was the day I came home from work and announced (as if I were holding a frying pan over his head) that I wanted to have a baby. That was all I wanted… a baby. And what do you need to have a baby? Not much, I thought. Just an income, a healthy body, a relationship, and a brain to get through it all.
It would be perfect. I was a success, after all. I’d worked for more than 15 years in my industry and hit the pinnacle of my career, so it wouldn’t be that difficult to take a year off and get back into it. And hubby won’t have to worry, I’ll be home with the baby, taking him or her to coffee mornings, networking and keeping my hand in the industry while wearing two-inch heels and loving my little bundle of joy. Surely after a year I’d have a handle on the whole baby thing, I’d be back to looking fabulous, making top dollar, traveling the world and living the life of my dreams. Besides, just like everything else in my life, I’ll follow my way of life and make a list, create a strategy and then GO! I even called it my list-strategy-go process. My expectations were there and finally my life was coming to the point I had prepared for, in my mind.
It was 2pm on a Tuesday in September 2009, a week after I’d been admitted to hospital, when I brought home a beautiful baby boy. All the getting pregnant, being pregnant and mother-to-be planning (my list-strategy-go method) had come together. I walked into my beautiful terraced house in Sydney sat down and looked into the eyes of this little human we had created. I remember gently holding this precious little life, scared to move too quickly as he might break. I remember sitting on the couch, holding this little thing, watching my husband bringing in my bags from my week long stay in hospital and finally closing the door to the outside world. And all I remember was feeling the tears run down my face and thinking “oh fuck.” My life began to fall apart.
Continue reading the preface of The Want Gap here.